We all know that Provo has the notorious stereotype of "Love and Marriage". This has never bothered me much; I sometimes think its cute to see two people in love, walking around campus hand in hand. That's about all I can handle though. This past week I have had several run-ins with unacceptable public displays of affection. Not okay. Here's what I saw:
Experience #1: "Eye Gazers"
I've made some friends in my Book of Mormon class. Actually, not really, more like they always choose to sit right in front of me so I can't help but see their every move. This couple has a routine that they practice every Tuesday and Thursday: They come in to the lecture hall, sit down and the chick immediately starts caressing his neck and twirling his locks of hair in between her fingers. After about 20 minutes of this exchange, the roles switch and he begins to stroke her hair for about the same amount of time. When his time is up, they turn to each other and gaze into each other's eyes for the remaining 10 minutes of class. They don't break eye contact. Ever. It's beyond weird. And I feel sick after being forced to watch it. I think I'll have to find a new place to sit in order to avoid the "eye gazers".
Experience #2: "The Lobby Lovers"
This next couple has absolutely no social boundaries or personal space. I've seen this strange couple several times passing the time away, whispering sweet nothings to each other in the lobby where I live. I don't think they are aware, but I really don't enjoy seeing them every time I come home. I gave them the benefit of the doubt for quite some time, saying "they're freshman who don't have anywhere else to go, so they have to hang out in the lobby." I draw the line when I innocently walk in and they are full on making out. What kind of couple feels comfortable doing that in the middle of a freshman packed lobby? Boundaries, people, boundaries!
Experience #3: "The Joggers"
This couple wins the prize. The other day I was over at the Smith Fieldhouse taking a quick jog around the indoor track, when I saw quite a sight. This couple walked onto the track acting all lovey-dovey, and proceeded to jog with their arms fully wrapped around one another. I know, you probably don't believe me. I promise, I'm not lying. If only I would have had my camera with me to provide some proof. I have a few problems with this. First, I feel like it would be very awkward to try to run in a straight line when you're in a sideways embrace. Second, I think it would be nearly impossible to get your heart rate up to a level high enough to burn some calories. Third, I don't know about you, but I sweat when I run, my own sweat grosses me out, the last thing I would want is to be swimming in someone else's sweat, regardless if they were my one true love. Also, are they that infatuated with each other that they can't even spend ten minutes running around a track not touching each other? Yikes!
Call me cynical, heartless or any other adjective that goes along with those. Maybe its because I'm not "in love" that I find these experiences gag worthy. All I know is that I hope to never have a run in with the "eye gazers", the "lobby lovers", or "the joggers" ever again.
**If you happen to be any of these couples, please change your ways ASAP.
22 hours ago
Oh heavens! That is quite the disturbing images that were oh so forcefully sketched into my imagination. Although I will admit I've seen some pretty kinky things up here at Utah State. People just think it's ok to show their emotional lust for one another in front of anyone. Maybe I'm bitter, but I don't like to think that. People are just gross. We see enough of it on TV. The least they could do is tell us to close our eyes when we're walking past them. I'd probably feel better about it. But then again, probably not.
ReplyDeleteMay I just say that I absolutely hate the "Lobby Lovers!" It has gotten to the point of absolutely ridiculousness! We are planning an attack on them, so I guess we will see how things go. We were having a floor meeting in the mez on sunday and we were talking about these Lobby Lovers and someone looked out the window and said there were the "stroking" ones. So we all jumped up and stared at them through the window and they just kept on gazing into each others eyes and stroking each others arms, hair ect. Oh yuck! Don't you just love getting home from school and walking to your room and as you pass the lobby you see different couples spread throughout the lobby all cuddled up with each other, ya know it is my personal favorite part of getting home in the afternoon. . .
ReplyDeletestacie you crack me up! haha. This post definitely had me busting a gut.
ReplyDelete